Have you ever gone on a date or been in a relationship with someone and found yourself becoming increasingly disappointed? Have you ever found yourself feeling less than satisfied? I have. It’s happened so many times. I’ll meet someone that I think is the bee’s knees and I’ll immediately censor myself. I’ll only present an edited and carefully selected version of Lara. I don’t want to come off as an emotional freak or let the 57 pictures of my cat on my phone fly free.
I end up presenting this person a mask. It’s a mask over the real version of myself. I leave out most of the quirky personality traits and emotional baggage in an effort to deem myself more lovable. But in the end, I only find myself left feeling empty and dissatisfied.
We all want to be accepted and loved. It’s human nature. We want to feel comfortable with who we are while simultaneously knowing that others can be comfortable with it as well.
But the problem is that we are taught from a young age to wear a mask. It is branded onto our brains that there are parts of us that should remain forever hidden. Now, I’m not advocating that you go on a first date and tell this person all about your exes and the emotional baggage that you now carry with you within the first five minutes. But I am advocating that you go on that date and allow the true aspects of your personality to shine through. I’m begging you to not wear the mask.
Honest love isn’t about appearances. It isn’t about making sure the other person only sees the best parts of you. It’s allowing someone to see the absolute worst, the best, the mediocre, and the uncensored parts and knowing that they will accept you through it all.
At the end of the day, if you allow someone to fall in love with your mask- you lose yourself. And if you then remove that mask, you will lose the relationship built around it.
Take off the mask. Know exactly who you are and be content with it. It’s only once you present yourself as exactly who you are that you will be able to find someone who loves you for you.